A month of fruitless visits and countless phone calls to Borders has finally ended.

Last night I dreamt that, at long last, I held the April issue of Uncut magazine in my hot little hands. When I awoke at 11:30 AM, I rolled out of bed, grabbed the cordless phone, and rang the Santa Monica Borders. In reply to my trepidatious query the salesperson spoke those long-awaited words: "The one with the Police on the cover? Yeah, we have it."

We burned west as fast as my roommate's Cadillac would carry us, and now I sit here at my computer with the precious periodical in my lap. O Elysium!

The article? So far I've only skimmed it. I did look at the pictures. =)